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Good Morning, ,
Today is Friday, April 28
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!


Right now it is snowing again. 
It will probably all melt by May.
Have FUN!
DerWebby

Todays Bonehead Award:
Teen admits to killing her grandparents and sealing 
up their room  then inviting friends over for a party
Details at  Boneheads
______________________________________________________
Today, April 28 in
1686 The first volume of Isaac Newton's "Principia Mathamatic" was published.
See More of what happened on this
day in history.
______________________________________________________
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________ We are all apt to believe what the world believes about us. --- George Eliot (1819 - 1880) Cynics regarded everybody as equally corrupt... Idealists regarded everybody as equally corrupt, except themselves. --- Robert Anton Wilson There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity. --- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe ______________________________________________________ If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! ______________________________________________________ Thanks to Bill for this story: came home from the bar one night quite inebreated and wanted to sneak in so his spouse wouldn't know. Unfortunately the mickey in 's back pocket broke as tried to sneak up the stairs and fell backwards. Some of the glass cut 's rear end. grabbed the box of bandaids and attempted to cover the cuts. The next morning 's spouse Remarked: "You were pretty drunk when you came home last night." How did you know ?" replied. Well she said "Your shoes were sitting on the porch and there was broken glass at the bottom of the stairs and a smelly booze stain on the carpet but the clincher was the 15 bandaids stuck on the hall mirror." _____________________________________________________ Malwarebytes for Home | Anti-Malware Premium | Free Trial Download ______________________________________________________ Dave's collection of The World's Thinnest Books FRENCH WAR HEROES by Jacques Chirac HOW I SERVED MY COUNTRY by Jane Fonda MY BEAUTY SECRETS by Janet Reno and Nancy Pelosi MY SUPER BOWL HIGHLIGHTS by Dan Marino THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL by Hillary Clinton MY LITTLE BOOK OF PERSONAL HYGIENE by Osama Bin Laden THINGS I CANNOT AFFORD by Bill Gates THINGS I WOULD NOT DO FOR MONEY by Dennis Rodman MY WILD YEARS by Al Gore AMERICA'S MOST POPULAR LAWYERS DETROIT: a Travel Guide A COLLECTION of MOTIVATIONAL SPEECHES by Dr. J. Kevorkian ALL THE MEN I HAVE LOVED BEFORE by Ellen de Generes GUIDE TO DATING ETIQUETTE by Mike Tyson THE AMISH PHONE DIRECTORY MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS by O. J. Simpson And the world's Number One Thinnest Book MY BOOK OF MORALS by Bill Clinton with introduction by The Rev. Jessie Jackson ______________________________________________________ Ready for spring. Yes, it is snowing right now. ______________________________________________________
If you like the Humor Letter, please vote! Thanks for your votes!
______________________________________________________ Reported by the Bausell Sailor An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD has been earned by Cassie Bjorge, 17, Johnny Rider, 18 Gwinnett County, Georgia Teen admits to killing her grandparents and sealing up their room then inviting friends over for a party A Georgia teen who allegedly confessed to killing her grandparents with her boyfriend, sealing up their room and then hosting a party for unsuspecting friends, also planned to kill several other people WSB-TV reports. According to WSB-TV, Cassie Bjorge, 17, and her boyfriend, Johnny Rider, 18, planned the murders of her grandparents for days and thought out details such as caulking the doors shut in the house to keep the odor of death from being detected outside. Gwinnett County Police Detective Dave Brucz told WSB-TV the teens waited outside Bjorges grandparents home for the lights to go out, then snuck into the couple's bedrooms. "Johnny began to attack the grandfather, Cassie then said she had a surge of energy," Brucz said in court Wednesday. "She then dragged her grandmother into her grandfather's bedroom, she was duct taped." Investigators say the teens then beat the grandparents, Randall and Wendy Bjorge, before slicing their throats and leaving them for dead. According to the report, Cassie Bjorge confessed to staying in the home and smoking pot for a few days after the murders. She even invited friends over for a party friends who had no idea what had happened. Police say Bjorge confessed that she went as far as pretending to be her grandmother via text message so family wouldn't suspect anything was wrong. "She admitted after the murder she was texting family members because they were worried about them, and she was pretending to be Wendy," Brucz told the courtroom. WSB-TV reports the teens are not only accused of killing, Bjorge's grandparents, but they are also of trying to kill Rider's sister and boyfriend. "She also said they were planning on killing Johnny's family and there were plans on killing her mother also," Brucz also told the courtroom. ______________________________________________________ Tech Support Pits From: Pat Re: Fuzzy close-ups Dear Webby When I take close-ups with my digital camera, the center always seems to be fuzzy. Distance shots are clear, so it's not a greasy fingerprint on the lens. It's a very small lens and recessed anyway. What could cause that? Thanks Pat Dear Pat Especially with small lenses the aperture has to open up wide if the lighting is low. That causes the area of sharpness to shrink to a thin layer. If you can add extra light, that will thicken the layer of sharpness. When you can't add light, go farther away. Use the highest resolution you got, and then later crop the picture to get your close-up. When you are really close, the layer that is in focus is maybe half an inch thick. That might be the tips of a flower, and the inner parts of a deep blossom might be fuzzy. From a few feet away, the layer of sharpness would be 5-6 inches and plenty to show the entire flower nice and sharp. Close-up lenses and microscopes are no help at all. They make that effect even worse. Using the flash often helps. The camera pre-calculates the effect of the flash and squints down the aperture. On a close-up most of the flash will shoot right by it and what light from it, that hits the object, will be at a good angle and improve contrast. If you plan to take a lot of close up pictures, select a camera with a large lens to capture as much light as possible, so that it will narrow down the aperture. Shoot the picture at the cameras highest resolution, and then crop it down to 1024 x 768, which is probably the largest size picture that you would use on a web page. Have FUN! DearWebby
Recently a large seminar was held for ministers in training. Among the guests were many well-known motivational speakers. One such boldly approached the pulpit and, gathering the entire crowd's attention, said, "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman that wasn't my wife!" The crowd was shocked! He followed up by saying, "And that woman was my mother!" The crowd burst into laughter and he gave his speech, which went over well. About a week later one of the ministers who had attended the seminar decided to use that joke in his sermon. As he shyly approached the pulpit one sunny Sunday, he tried to rehearse the joke in his head. It seemed a bit foggy to him this morning. Getting to the microphone he said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of another woman that was not my wife!" His congregation sat shocked. After standing there for almost 10 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, the pastor finally blurted out, "...and I can't remember who she was!"
If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Water Saving Tip #4 When you are waiting for hot water to warm up put a watering can under the faucet. Once full use it for gardening. Place a bucket in your shower to catch water that is wasted while you wait for it to warm up. Tip provided by http://www.ThriftyFun.com
Skylight
____________________________________________________ I've noticed the oddest behavior in most women. The only time they won't look in a mirror is when they're pulling out of a parking space. ___________________________________________________
She's super talented.....but this is just weird.
Each Friday night I drove my wife to the train station so she could go visit her sister who was ill. Ten minutes later, MY sister arrived by train so that she could manage our house over the weekend while my wife was gone. On Sundays this procedure worked in reverse with my sister departing by train ten minutes before my wife arrived. One evening after my sister left and while I awaited my wife's arrival, a porter sauntered over. "Mister," he said, "you sure have some system going! But one of these days you're goin' to get caught!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.
____________________________________________________

Today, on April 28
0357 Constantius II visited Rome for the first time. 

1282 Villagers in Palermo led a revolt against French rule
in Sicily. 

1686 The first volume of Isaac Newton's "Principia
Mathamatic" was published. 

1789 A mutiny on the British ship Bounty took place when a
rebel crew took the ship and set sail to Pitcairn Island.
The mutineers left Captain W. Bligh and 18 sailors adrift. 

1818 U.S. President James Monroe proclaimed naval
disarmament on the Great Lakes and Lake Champlain. 

1896 The Addressograph was patented by J.S. Duncan. 

1902 A revolution broke out in the Dominican Republic. 

1910 First night flight was performed by Claude Grahame-
White in England. 

1914 W.H. Carrier patented the design of his air
conditioner. 

1916 The British declared martial law throughout Ireland. 

1919 The League of Nations was founded. 

1920 Azerbaijan joined the USSR. 

1923 The British Empire Exhibition Stadium (or Empire
Stadium) opened to the public. 

1930 The first organized night baseball game was played in
Independence, Kansas. 

1932 The yellow fever vaccine for humans was announced. 

1937 The first animated-cartoon electric sign was displayed
on a building on Broadway in New York City. It was created
by Douglas Leight. 

1945 Benito Mussolini and his mistress Clara Petacci were
executed by Italian partisans as they attempted to flee the
country. 

1946 The Allies indicted Tojo with 55 counts of war crimes. 

1947 Norwegian anthropologist Thor Heyerdahl and five others
set out in a balsa wood raft known as Kon Tiki to prove that
Peruvian Indians could have settled in Polynesia. The trip
began in Peru and took 101 days to complete the crossing of
the Pacific Ocean. 

1952 The U.S. occupation of Japan officially ended when a
treaty with the U.S. and 47 other countries went into
effect. 

1953 French troops evacuated northern Laos. 

1962 In the Sahara Desert of Algeria, a team led by Red
Adair used explosives to put out the well fire known as the
Devil's Cigarette Lighter. The fire was caused by a pipe
rupture on November 6, 1961. 

1965 The U.S. Army and Marines invaded the Dominican
Republic to evacuate Americans. 

1967 Muhammad Ali refused induction into the U.S. Army and
was stripped of boxing title. He cited religious grounds for
chickening out. 

1985 The largest sand castle in the world was completed near
St. Petersburg, FL. It was four stories tall. 

1988 In Maui, HI, one flight attendant was killed when the
fuselage of a Boeing 737 ripped open in mid-flight. 

1989 Mobil announced that they were divesting from South
Africa because congressional restrictions were too costly. 

1994 Former CIA official Aldrich Ames, who had given U.S.
secrets to the Soviet Union and then Russia, pled guilty to
espionage and tax evasion. He was sentenced to life in
prison without parole. 

1996 U.S. President Clinton gave a 4 1/2 hour videotaped
testimony as a defense witness in the criminal trial of his
former Whitewater business partners. 

1997 A worldwide treaty to ban chemical weapons took effect.
Russia and other countries such as Iraq and North Korea did
not sign. 

1999 The U.S. House of Representatives rejected (on a tie
vote of 213-213) a measure expressing support for NATO's
five-week-old air campaign in Yugoslavia. The House also
voted to limit the president's authority to use ground
forces in Yugoslavia. 

2001 A Russian rocket launched from Central Asia with the
first space tourist aboard. The crew consisted of California
businessman Dennis Tito and two cosmonauts. The destination
was the international space station. 

2008 India set a world record when it sent 10 satellites
into orbit from a single launch. 

2017  smiled.
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